Moving is complicated. It can be exciting, and it can be terrifying. It can bring desired change and opportunity, and it also brings routine disruption, stress, and the unknown.
My partner, our dogs, and myself have moved across the country multiple times in the last 15 years. Each move brought with it a new life stage, and new opportunities. And each move was stressful, whether we were excited or not.
At this point, between my own moves, and helping clients through the moving process, I have some tips to share to make all stages of the move, before, during, and after smoother with a little preparation.
Please note: I’m not covering air travel in this blog, but many of the preparation and arrival considerations are the same!
Each family and pet handles the disruption differently. Some pets do better observing and being in the middle of the packing. Some pets prefer to hang out in their safe space, over there, away from the clatter of cutlery clashing and voices hollering across the room.
No matter who your pet is, make sure to keep their safe space intact as long as possible. Giving them a place where they know they can go, take a deep breath, and get away from the kerfuffle will help them cope with routine disruptions, sounds, and environmental changes.
While I know it is hard, try to maintain some anchors of your daily routine. Predictability is hugely important for stress management and coping, so maintaining little bits of the routine will help your pet know what’s next and reduce some of the stress. If you’re interested in learning more about predictability, check out this blog about predictability and why we actually love spoilers.
P.S. Make sure the space is actually safe; teetering boxes and stuff leaned against the wall should be secured so nothing falls.
Once you get to your new place, the last thing you want to do is deal with paperwork. Or at least, more paperwork than you need to. So before you move, take some time to get your pet’s things in order:
If possible, I also encourage families to see their pet’s vet one more time and to double-check the following:
Find some time to take stock of your pet’s current care routine. What management is non-negotiable (for you or them)? What enrichment activities help your pet be their best selves? What fills their cup?
Make a list of the things that you need to have readily available during the move and immediately after you arrive. Here’s what’s in my dog’s essentials bag:
What you need readily available when you arrive will depend on your pet’s needs, so think about what you currently do to help your pet be successful.
You need a clear plan before moving day. If you have multiple people in the family, determine who is responsible for what elements of the day. Put someone in charge of the pets, so nothing falls through the cracks. In my house, it is me. I’m responsible for keeping the dogs away from the open doors, getting under foot, sequestered from strangers in the home, and managing their stress.
Putting one person in charge makes sure that it isn’t “somebody’s” job, that everyone assumes is taking care of it, when in reality, no one is.
Go heavy on your management plan! Use crates, carriers, or secure rooms while boxes are being moved in and out, or movers are in the place. Throw sound masking, scent masking, and all your tools into the ring.
Prevent escape risks by using two barriers always. This can be crates, gates, doors, leashes, tethers… what will work for you and your pet depends on, well, you! Use clear communication between you and your family when moving the pets around. You don’t want to think the front door is closed, let the dogs into the living room, and then need to spend the day trying to get your dogs into the car.
If possible, avoid the Moving Day chaos all together by getting the pet out of the house. If you can coordinate time at a local space rental, stay with a friend, send your dog to daycare, at a trusted pet sitter, or coordinate the movers to arrive and pack after you’ve reached your destination.
We all want calm pets during travel. Part of our pet stress management is providing those anchors of familiarity where we can (see Tip 1). Provide your pet with as much familiarity as you can, bring unwashed bedding or favorite toys in the care. If you have sound masking or audio that your pets know and associate with good things, turn that on. If you’ve taught certain scents to be calming, you can use those.
If you have a co-pilot, have someone responsible for planning out rest stops along the way. If you don’t, I recommend having a plan for stopping, and navigating bathroom breaks, getting food, and checking into overnight lodging, long before you hit the road. Don’t try to plan and coordinate when you’re already stressed, it is quite hard!
Again, clear, direct communication is helpful at rest stops. Who is responsible for the pets? Who is getting food? Where can you get the dogs out to stretch their legs away from a lot of traffic? Take a minute to know who is responsible for what, so that no balls get dropped.
If you are staying overnight in an environment, pull out all your safe space skills!
Boy, do I feel like a broken record.
To help your pet adjust to the new home, set up their safe space. Getting pets settled after moving will take some time, but pulling out their known safety, a bed, a blanket, their long-term calming projects, their familiar training games, and their enrichment plans will help speed up the process.
Observe if your assumptions about your pet’s safe space are true. You may find, in the new place, that they need something different. In California, we slept with the windows open, and in Washington, we need blackout and sound-dampening curtains. I’ve had clients who either had to reduce or increase their sound masking. We may or may not need window film. We may need different temperature accommodations.
Remember, the safe space you built was built for your last environment; this one may need some tweaks.
Carve out time to fill their cup and yours, because moving stress is real! The sooner you can start implementing some familiarity and routine back into your pet’s life, the better. It doesn’t need to be big things; it may be little things like re-establishing your breakfast and dinner routine. It may be prompting a familiar game, like chase, wrestling, or tug. Or 15 minutes at the end of the day to simply be together. Or a walk on their long line at a local park.
It will take some time for the family to get used to the little creaks of the new place, or the sounds of the neighborhood, but in the meantime, return to some normalcy, and some of the activities you know benefit you and your pet.
As your cognitive load lifts and you start to get into the swing of your new normal, pause to observe your pet. What changes do they need in this new environment? Observe their behavior, their health, and their routines so you can meet their needs now, not the needs from before.
Moving is inherently stressful. Even when things go perfectly, there are no hiccups, and you can’t wait for the next stage in life, it is stressful. Helping pets adapt to their new home, routine, and life can be a lot, but it doesn’t have to be overwhelming. I’ve helped families create full transition routines, from skill building all the way through settling in to create stress-free moving with their pets.
Here’s to harmony,
Ellen
Working with our team means you get experts guiding you to focus on what will make a difference, carry the cognitive load of planning, and be with you to troubleshoot when you’re already pulled in too many directions.
Whether you have a move on your horizon or simply want to be prepared for “what ifs,” we’re here to help.
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