5 Things a Behavior Consultant Will Tell You That the Internet Won't

Estimated reading time: 6 mins

If you live with a behaviorally challenging pet, your search history is probably a list of questions like “why is my dog [doing behavior]” or “how to get my cat to stop [that thing].” Plus a long list of amazon purchases of puzzle feeders and other enrichment items. Yet the problems are still happening with no end in sight.

Next thing you know, you’ve invested in a behavior consultant you found on social media who you hope will finally help you solve your problem. But in the first meeting, the consultant is asking BIZARRE questions. A laundry list about poop. Information on what your dog’s ears and tail do when they see a trigger. You are then wondering what any of this has to do with fixing the problem. Google never asks those questions!

The internet is selling you a prescription

The internet’s answers to your questions are one-size fits all prescriptive solutions. It’s going to show how things “should be done.” That is, if the behavior was happening in a vacuum with no other input or feedback from outside factors. But life doesn’t happen that way; behavior is constantly affected by all sorts of things, so a prescriptive solution isn’t going to work.

Defining Our Terms

Prescriptive – Approaches that focus on intentions. These are blanket plans or activities applied regardless of context. In other words, these approaches are prescribed for a situation with the assumption that they are the remedy to the issue.
Descriptive – Approaches that focus on outcomes. Descriptive plans or activities identify a goal, use metrics to track progress toward the goal, and rely on observations to assess what is and isn’t working, making adjustments accordingly.

As your behavior consultant, I am coming in hot with poop questions to take a descriptive approach to behavior change. Because your pet is an individual, and so are you. Daily routines, living spaces, diets, medical history, etc. are all variables that matter when making a plan that is not only going to achieve the goal, but will be sustainable to be successful long term. I am going to dig deep and give you solutions for your situation that the internet never could.

To that end, here are some things you might learn from me in the process that the internet could never.

1. We want the "irrelevant" details — because nothing is actually irrelevant

When you ask the internet about your dog’s behavior problem it spits out a fix to the problem. One size fits all training plans. You know the ones…that you’ve tried and don’t seem to work.

It takes many puzzle pieces to make up the whole behavioral picture. Medical diagnoses, genetics, environmental set ups, and learning history with emotional ties all contribute. I am going to ask so many questions, some that may seem random but could actually be the missing puzzle piece that slid under the couch. I want you to tell me the little, weird, “probably doesn’t mean anything” details. Chances are it’s helpful!

2. We see a personality, not a problem to be corrected

Sundae the goat and her bestie Sully the dog hanging out in the house

Your dog isn’t a robot. They don’t just have one perfect program setting that they’ll be set on for their whole lives. They are living and breathing beings who have preferences, personalities, and possibly deep inner thoughts that we’ll never get to know. They are beings that change as they age, where life gives them choices and opportunities to expand who they are as an individual.

The internet is going to tell you what is “right and wrong” or what a “perfect dog” looks and acts like. But what is right for one person’s situation is wrong for another’s. It’s important to never leave out the details of the silly things that your dog does that brings you so much joy!

I know I get weird looks when I say my goats end up on the bed or even the kitchen counters. It’s wrong for some people, but for me it’s important that they feel comfortable in the house. If we get really bad weather or fireworks, we don’t have a barn to secure them in. We use the house as their safe space when they need it.

3. Animals do gross, animal things, and most of it isn't a problem

Eating food out of the garbage and rolling in dead bugs doesn’t sound like my kind of fun, but hey I’m not a dog and I’m not here to judge. Our dogs do things that we would never dream of doing, but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong for them to do it.

That’s not to say it’s okay to let your dog just eat whatever they find. There are risks to consider. A piece of pizza crust is probably okay (unless an allergy is involved), but chicken bones, which could splinter and cause damage to their mouth or throat, are not. By making a list of the weird gross things your dog does and letting your behavior consultant know we can help you decide what interventions to take; whether that be managing, training, or getting your dog to the vet for a medical check-up.

4. You don't have to live the life the internet says you should

Let me say this really loud for the people in the back. THE INTERNET IS FAKE!!!

Influencers have learned good camera angles and lighting to make sure you don’t see all the dog hair floating around like tumbleweeds. Videos take a while to edit, with all the cutting and piecing together the perfect moment.
We aren’t perfect and neither are our pets. Training sessions go haywire, fluff explodes from toys in a matter of seconds, or their non-stop energy is driving you nuts. It’s okay, because that’s life. The animals we share our lives with aren’t programmed robots, and it’s unrealistic to think they should act that way.

Don’t apologize for the dog toys scattered all over the floor, or your dog blocking your screen because they’re comfy on the couch during our session. Your environment is set up for your vision of success. Do what makes you and your dog happy, because we all deserve some happiness in this crazy world.

5. What's "normal" for your household is allowed to be different from someone else's

Ask the internet what training you should do with your dog to work on their X behavior and you’re going to get some generic answers, many that might not work since your situation is different from others. Don’t even get me started on the list of enrichment items it says you “should” give your dog– the list of puzzle feeders, lick mats, and toys are endless.

Not every option is right for every pet or every household. I’m going to ask you questions about your dog’s likes and dislikes, along with things that are going to directly impact your daily routine and needs-before suggesting what options to spend money on.

If you’re not going to do a thing suggested because it’s not physically possible or you don’t have the energy and bandwidth, then it’s not a good part of the plan. I’m there to help make your life a little easier, not harder.

The overarching ideas I have for a pet are prescriptive; management, training, and enrichment. But the amount of creative descriptiveness I have when ideas get flowing, is what helps pet parents find small wins that lead to huge progress.

Use your internet search for recipes, not training advice

The internet is great for lots of things. But it also reaches billions of people and tries to find a solution for everyone. My job as a behavior consultant is to find the tiny details that make up your life with your dog, and fit a plan to the specific needs for your household.

Your dog isn’t perfect. They’re not the dogs in your late night doomscrolls. They have weird personalities just like we do, and they should be acknowledged and celebrated.

Here’s to harmony,

Beccy

Now What?

Start making a list of any known medical issues, dietary restrictions, and weird habits your dog does. Hang it on your fridge so whenever something pops up you can write it down immediately.

Observe your dog’s body language more. You can even attend a Behavior Observation Practice session to get a glimpse of what the professionals are looking for.

When you’re done fighting with the advice you’ve gotten from the internet, book a session with us!

PS: Capitalism

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