#188 - Behavior Advice You Couldn't Bring Yourself to Follow

Helping Your Pet Shouldn’t Hurt

October 14, 2026

TLDL (Too Long, Didn’t Listen):

✅ Advice that hurts your relationship — Alpha rolling, squirt bottles, and “nothing in life is free” turn you and your pet into opponents. You got a pet for the companionship, so if the advice makes things combative instead of collaborative, walk away.

✅ Advice that pushes you away from your goal — Ignoring your dog when you get home or taking food from their bowl doesn’t make them more secure. Some things do look worse before they get better, but a good pro tells you that up front and tells you how to get through it.

✅ Advice that serves everyone but your pet — Going through the door first, keeping your dog off the furniture, no sleeping in the bed. If it doesn’t work for you and your pet, find something that does.

Episode Overview:

After years of having clients come to us, scared and worried we’re going to parrot advice that leaves their stomach in knots, we’re finally laying it all out there. And yes, it gets a little spicy.

In this episode, Emily and Tiffany talk about bad dog training advice our clients have gotten that is just… not it. Whether it’s advice that hurts the relationship (like nothing in life is free, or alpha rolling), pushes you in the opposite direction of your goal (don’t greet your dog, take food from their bowl), or forces you to meet others’ expectations, not your pet’s needs (no sleeping in the bed, you must go through the door first), just because someone said it doesn’t mean you need to do it. 

Emily and Tiffany walk you through how to spot when this advice isn’t actually for you, what to do when something doesn’t sit right, and how to collaborate to update the plan to something that is for and with your pet, not to them.

Links & Resources from the Episode​

🧾 For full episode transcripts: Arial l OpenDyslexic

📖 Things We Wish Clients Would Tell Us 

📖 My Dog Growled at Me…and Other Tales of Resource Guarding in Dogs  

📖 Errybody’s Got an Opinion

📘 Plenty in Life is Free

🐾 Want a plan that’s actually for you and your pet? Our consultants build it with you, not at you. Work with a Pet Harmony Behavior Consultant.

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Meet the Hosts

Allie pic with Oso

Allie Bender, CDBC, CPDT-KA, SBA

Allie Bender is a Certified Dog Behavior Consultant, Certified Professional Dog Trainer- Knowledge Assessed, and a Shelter Behavior Affiliate. She has been in the animal welfare industry since 2006 and professionally training since 2012. She is the founder and co-owner of Pet Harmony, co-author of Canine Enrichment for the Real World, and a national speaker.

While in the animal sheltering industry, Allie realized that her passion lied in helping pets with maladaptive behaviors. Today she spends most of her time teaching other trainers and behavior professionals the skills they need to have their most fulfilling, sustainable careers.

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EMIly strong

Emily Strong has been in the animal welfare industry since 1990 and has been a behavior consultant since 2008. She is the co-owner of Pet Harmony, co-author of Canine Enrichment for the Real World, and a national speaker. 

Emily started working with animals at a young age and struggled with the notion that you have to hurt, scare, or intimidate animals to help them. Emily loves helping current and prospective behavior professionals and working with pet parents through our in-depth services. She enjoys working with all species.

Team Members in the Episode

A woman in a brightly colored knit hat in the woods with her dog. Tiffany Holmes, CPDT-KA.

Tiffany Holmes, CPDT-KA, FFCP

Tiffany Holmes is a trainer and behavior consultant with Pet Harmony. She is also a mentor in the PETPro mentorship program.

Tiffany is a “recovering technical writer” who gets to put her first career writing instructions to good use for her clients and mentees. She taught group classes for dogs (training) and people (yoga) before joining the original Pet Harmony Mentorship program and landing a job with us.

Check out more from Tiffany on the blog!

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